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Links
Spamusement
The Spam Poetry Institute
Anthology of Spam Poetry
A blog of the some of the strangest spam email titles (and the occasional message) that you are likely to find.
May 12, 2011
Secret from Mel Gibson
He knows what women want, after all. Something to do with men that wear tights and red nail polish.
Its about time that you should look rich and stand out among the crowed
That way, the mugger-chickens can spot you easily.
Everyone will have sore eyes from your Rolex
....because it flies apart sporadically and is very very VERY pointy. ....plus it shoots acid from its dial. ....and it's very very bright. ...and it's freakishly ugly.
Best tool to pick girls up
Stanley latex-grip girl-tongs. You can buy them at Bunnings apparently.
Replica watch! Anjelina Jolie has same!
That would be the near-flawless clone of Angelina Jolie? Is she the replica you're watching?
Crafted so well, takes more than a professional to tell the difference
Yes. It takes a professional and his pet goat.
She couldn't understand why the area in my pants was classified in X-Files
Hint: Crop circles.
Build up your confidence. Enlarge your Pole
I definitely feel confident walking round town with Piotr since he was doubled in size to nearly 12 ft tall. "Come and 'ave a go if ya think yer 'ard enough!".
Make your wrist glow
Paint it with Uranium!
October 05, 2010
If you choose us, we will enlarge it. Discover the unknowns of your lady.
The downside is that you either have to get the whole lady enlarged into some kind of giantess, or have just....bits...of her enlarged.
Whatever turns you on.
But if she asks you if her bum looks big, remember that if she is twice your size everywhere else as well, she will hurt you if she doesn't like your answer.
Whatever turns you on.
But if she asks you if her bum looks big, remember that if she is twice your size everywhere else as well, she will hurt you if she doesn't like your answer.
October 04, 2010
Fashionable female bags and the Swiss watch
The sequel to Fashionable Female Bags and the Chamber of Gucci
October 01, 2010
The sexual answer
is it "Yes, yes, oh GOD! YES!!!"?
more likely to be "not tonight, I have a headache" isn't it :(
I have tasted IT it is more pleasant
Mmm, I often snack on laptops, printers and hard drives...
Mysterious sexuality. Mysterious length.
.....you want to put ....what??? .....where?????
September 29, 2010
The definitive mark of your arrival.
If it involves any kind of stain, I do not want to know, thank you.
Arm Second aerial hundred Celtic
Erich Von Daniken was right. Not only could the Celts fly, they had armed squadrons - at least two of them!
is a as the Ralph
No, "A" as in "Apple".
Need to work on the spelling a bit more.
Need to work on the spelling a bit more.
July 08, 2010
Festival Woman Carrot Database Aircraft Carrier
Now you know why hippychicks don't tend to shave under their arms. The hair conceals landing pads for Carrot Database Aircraft. Hmm reminds me, I need to run an SQL query on this root vegetable...
His whopping shaft Fernando
Odd, I don't remember those lyrics in the ABBA classic. Still, I guess it would have made crossing the Rio Grande easier - Fernando could have just pole-vaulted.
Enter the New Year with a bigger penis!
Because *this* year is complaining you don't satisfy it.
July 06, 2010
Now you have a chance to purchase diploma of any degree in any field.
Oh great. I thought you at least had to use a dodgy website - but no. So common you can stop in random fields and pick them up.
July 05, 2010
Fascinating windows house
Which doesn't have quite the same ring as "Apple Store".
Excellent apps mole
Moles that dig those apps up. They are a bit of a challenge to train, though - and they're not keen on the light, so they don't deliver.
Invaluable needware store
The latest craze: needware. Don't think YOU don't need it!
May 31, 2010
Ive away both the St. Michael and herself, but in her ow
Sounds painful.
May 04, 2010
Earance for dinner; he pleaded headache
I would too. I hate earance.
March 25, 2010
Renew passion
It's overdue.
Success muzhiks things.
Indeed it does.
Liveliness of your night stick
Dammit! Someone catch that thing!
Get a resolute rod-on
You just don't want a rod that isn't sure.
Might up your manliness
Then again, it might not.
Ght through the woods, he galloped, and he nev
Pure poetry!
Want your hose to get stiff?
Anything to stop those annoying kinks that make the water stop flowing.
Pop and move in&out
Dislocation is an awesomely fun way to spend an afternoon.
Get maximum form love
I love forms. Maybe forms can love me?
For security of your staying energy
Staying energy is often prone to going.
Don't stop your trouser monkey
If he keeps dancing, people might put money in the hat.
March 02, 2010
Pneumatic Uvula Stigmata Society of York
Apparently, this is a disease.
Yes.
Right.
Yes.
Right.
March 01, 2010
Christian singles are a cluck away.
Christian singles. Brought to you by the people who brought you cheese singles and individually wrapped hotdog sausages. Now with added chicken fetish.
Look younger in 20 mints
age reducing confectionary now available.
